Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Slap-Happy Matty: Extreme

Poor, poor Matt. He didn't have to go into work until 5am today, but he didn't get home until after 7pm. We had very little time together, so he wanted to help me in the kitchen. Oh. Joy.

It started when I asked him to make some salads for lunches. He was putting grape tomatoes on them. As I washed dishes I heard:

"Tom-ay-to, tom-ah-to. Tom-ay-to, tom-ah-to."

Then Matt leaned over to pick something up. The skinny dude was wearing his large pajama pants, so I got to see a whole lot of crack. I pointed that out to him. As I washed dishes I heard:

"That's because I get up at the butt-crack of dawn. The hairy butt-crack of dawn. Butt-crackage. Butt-crack-a-mungus. Butt-crackular."

And then the cat walked by...

"We don't have to take it anymore. Cats should be able to lick their butt-cracks in public - lift your leg high!"

It was an interesting night...he was asleep by nine.

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