Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Keep Your Yucky Tomato-Brains

I want to be healthy, I really do, but I can't stand tomato-brains.

You know what they are, I know you do. Every time you bite into a cherry tomato and the soggy skull pops and spills the slimy, gooey brains onto your tongue. Yuck! There has got to be a better way!

So I tried the Roma tomatoes. They're too big to pop in one bite, so I sliced one up and jabbed it with a fork. The rind stuck, but not those little seeds. Those gelatinous tomato fetuses, sliding all over the place, wrapped in a red amniotic fluid. Tiny tomato babies, never to be born.

Tomatoes have got to be the world's grossest food. It's either brains or babies - how can that be healthy?? I'm not sure, but with some salt and a clothes pin I can manage to eat the oyster wannabe. Ick.

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