Family Vacation!

I've been out of town for two weeks, so Linda spent some time with her siblings while I was gone. She used to be a regular at the Lumen Christi football games, but hasn't been able to go since moving north. Everything worked out last weekend for her to travel south and spend a weekend with her Jackson-based brother, Colorado-living sister, and, of course, Lumen Christi football.

Looks like we've all had a great vaca!

Communicating: Tongue-Tied No More

Aunt Linda and me on a chilly July 4th.

I've never met a person more generous than Aunt Linda. Every time we walk past the children's department in a clothing store, she finds an outfit she'd like to buy for every child she knows. She knits hats, scarves, and pot holders for anyone she's ever met (and even donates some to various charitable organizations for the people she hasn't met yet). Some day, when we're rich and frivolous, we'll have fun giving away our money and buying things for people. Until then, we dream about it.

It's important to understand Linda's generous nature in order to understand her actions. There are times when she can't quite verbally express her motivations, so I need to rely on my knowledge of the situation and Linda's personality to know what's going on.

For example, we recently planned a night at the movies with our friends Hope and Nick and two of their kids. We all enjoy the movies, but what we really look forward to are the snacks. Matt and I can share, but Linda refuses to sit next to use (she doesn't like to watch us cuddle), so she gets her own food and sits a row or two ahead of us.

She'll usually buy herself a medium drink and small popcorn, but during this particular outing she ordered a large tub. Matt double checked with Linda that she did, in fact, want the large popcorn (he knows how it upsets her stomach). She insisted. Matt looked at me for some help, but I waved him off. "Okay, get the large."

Here's the thing about Linda - it's hard enough to find the right words to say what she means in every day situations, and when you put her on the spot, she chokes. If I had pressed her and tried to force the small popcorn on her, she would have become upset and frustrated while insisting on the large. Instead, I tapped in to what I know: Hope's family was meeting us at the movies and Linda loves to give. Sure enough, when our friends arrived Linda handed them her bucket. She ate a bit off the top, but the rest was theirs.

Living with a special-needs individual can be difficult if you expect them to think, act, and communicate the same way you do. Instead of trying to force them into your mold, get to know their molds. Linda can't always use her words to express herself, so I have to be more observant. By paying attention and letting her communicate in her own way, Linda and I understand each other pretty well. Now we just need to earn that million dollars so we can hit the children's department.

Watch Your Tone of Voice ... Other People are Paying Attention

Matt and Linda are quite the team.

When I started this blog, I wanted to write honest, insightful observations about having Aunt Linda live with me. I've posted some photo updates and such, but I've avoided the more honest writings. Part of me doesn't want to offend. Part of me doesn't want to reveal too much. The writer in me, however, wants to be genuine. After chatting with Matt, we've decided to go ahead with the blog as planned. Nothing here is meant to offend or point fingers - these are merely observations about our new life.

I've known Linda my whole life. She changed my diapers, gave me bottles, and spent almost every July 4th at our family's house. Growing up with a handicapped aunt, I've never noticed anything odd or uncomfortable about her special needs, and I often forget that not everyone grew up with an Aunt Linda.

Matt and Linda met about a dozen times before she moved in with us. It's been an adjustment for both of them, but they're learning a lot about each other (and I'm learning too).

Generally Matt and Linda get along very well, but occasionally there's tension. The tension usually creeps in after a conversation, and it usually ends with Linda reminding Matt that she's not a child. After a few such episodes, I started paying attention. It didn't take me long to identify the problem.

Though he doesn't mean to, Matt talks to Linda differently than he does to me. If he wants to go to Kmart, he'll simply ask me, "Do you want to go to Kmart?" That's not the case with Linda, though. He doesn't mean to, but Matt's tone changes when talks to Linda. A simple question about going shopping turns into, "Hey, Linda! Do you want to go to Kmart?! We can walk around, see what's on sale. Maybe buy some candy?"

For Matt, like many people who didn't grow up around a handicapped individual, this weird instinct kicks in. My thought: Linda's childlike wonder and appreciation of life leads people to unconsciously talk to and coddle her like a child. Matt doesn't hear it, but Linda does.

There's a delicate balance between respecting her needs and respecting her age. Now that I've helped Matt identify this tension-causer, he's making an effort to change. He's paying attention to what he says and how he says it. We do sometimes need to explain things to her differently, but it's how you say it that matters.

Book Review: Once Upon a Prince by Rachel Hauck

Once Upon a Prince, the first novel in the Royal Wedding series by bestselling author Rachel Hauck, treats you to a modern-day fairy tale.

Susanna Truitt never dreamed of a great romance or being treated like a princess---just to marry the man she has loved for twelve years. But life isn’t going according to plan. When her high-school-sweetheart-turned-Marine-officer breaks up instead of proposing, Susanna scrambles to rebuild her life.

The last thing Prince Nathaniel expects to find on his American holiday to St. Simon’s Island is the queen of his heart. A prince has duties, and his family’s tense political situation has chosen his bride for him. When Prince Nathaniel comes to Susanna’s aid under the fabled Lover’s Oak, he is blindsided by love.

Their lives are worlds apart. He’s a royal prince. She’s an ordinary girl. But everything changes when Susanna receives an invitation to Nathaniel’s coronation.

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I'm a casual fan of Rachel Hauck, and I love fairy tale love stories, so I couldn't wait to read Once Upon a Prince. I really wanted to like this story. I read it to the end, desperate to find that sweet, unexpected plot point; unfortunately, I never found it.

This is a fun, easy read, but it's quite predictable and slightly juvenile. I could overlook the long conversations about love and politics between the prince and his right-hand man (even though my husband would never talk like that; then again, he's not a prince). The love story itself was a little weak, but it's fiction. What bothered me the most was the predictability. Imagine Princess Diaries 2 and The Prince and Me, smash them together, and this is pretty much the story you'd read, complete with stereotypical characters (although those movies were marketed toward the YA crowd, not adults).

This book wasn't bad, but it definitely wasn't what I had hoped. It's not going to surprise anyone, but if you're looking for a light story to pass the time, this book is a perfect fit.

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*I received a free copy of the book in exchange for an honest review as part of the Thomas Nelson BookSneeze program. The opinions are my own.

The Garden Walk of Death by Melting

This year Matt & I finally made it to the Friendly Garden Club garden walk in Traverse City. Linda got to go with us by default. Any regular day would have been a great day for a garden walk, but this year it happened to fall on the hottest day of the year: 96-101 degrees with 95% humidity.

I could tell you we were uncomfortable, but that would be like saying Dick Wolf has had a bit of TV success. We knew it would be hot, but we wanted to try it anyway. Linda was game, but on one condition - no pictures. (I managed to sneak in a few ... hee, hee).

We toured six gardens despite the liquid heat (including the fairy garden below).

Lots of flowers, lots of plants, lots of fun features.

Without question, Linda preferred the garden flying the Polish flag.

She didn't make it through all of the gardens, but she did enjoy the flora and fauna before the heat got to her. Though she missed three of the gardens, we have photo evidence from the walk so she can forever enjoy the flowers.

Hopefully next year it will be a little cooler and we can all enjoy all of the beauty (and the adorable little frogs riding on the backs of fake ducks).

The Bike (and Horn)

It's here! Linda's bike arrived three days early, but she was not willing to wait to get it going. She kept asking Matt when he would be able to put her bike together (he said it was every hour on the hour - I wasn't here to witness this, but I don't doubt it). He sneaked outside to work on it while she was distracted with the cats.

Aunt Linda picked out a bright pink Schwinn to ride around town. Since everyone in my family likes to make sure others know where we are at all times, she also selected a horn (which she and Matt tested ... in Wal-mart ... multiple times).

It didn't take long for Linda to wonder what happened to Matt, so she came outside to boss, er, um ... supervise.

Almost done ...

Success! She wasn't quite ready to ride it around town yet, but everything is adjusted to her liking and it's ready to go. Now we just need to give her some errands to run ...

Book Review: Chasing Francis: A Pilgrim's Tale by Ian Morgan Cron

Pastor Chase Falson has lost his faith - and he did it right in front of the congregation of his mega-church. Now the elders want him to take some time away. Chase visits his Franciscan-priest uncle in Italy, where he studies the teachings of Francis of Assisi and rediscovers Francis' ancient faith.
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Cron calls this book "wisdom literature," a combination of fiction and non-fiction. I was told it was a novel, so I read it as a novel, and I was not disappointed. Cron pulls you in on the opening page with his easy style and beautiful prose (I've re-read his passage on Italian nuns several times - he has a mastery of words!). It's easy to relate to and with Chase Falson as he struggles through his faith because Cron creates believable characters with real dilemmas. You experience Chase's struggles, see Italy through his eyes, and walk in his shoes - it's everything you want from a well-written novel.

My big beef with the book is that it was pitched as a novel, but it's "wisdom literature," so it was kind of preachy (literally, there's a long sermon at the end). Despite this, however, I still enjoyed the book. As I said, I chose to read it as a novel, and as novel it is superb.

As "wisdom literature," however, I don't agree with his conclusion (as Christians we strive to be Christ-like, not Francis-like).

I wasn't sure how to rate this book, so I split the difference. As a novel (pure fiction), five stars. As wisdom literature (with theology laced in), three stars. Even if you don't agree with his conclusion, though, this is a fabulous read. I haven't read such a well-written story in a long time.

*I received a copy of this book for free as part of the Book Sneeze program in exchange for an honest review. These opinions are my own.
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There You'll Find Me by Jenny B. Jones: I couldn't put the book down (though a little melodramatic, but it is a YA novel). Jones combine the right amount of subplot, romance, drama and comedy. Now one of my favorite authors. *****

Lonestar Angel by Colleen Coble: I appreciate that novels need to start with action ,but this book jumped in so quickly that I had no idea who the characters were and I didn't really care what they were doing. Couple that with a predictable plot, and I found it hard to keep reading. **1/2

The Paris Wife by Paula McLain: A fictionalized account of Hadley Richardson Hemingway, Ernest's first wife. Engaging. Not action packed or mysterious, but so captivating that it was hard to put down. A very entertaining read. ***1/2

Arts & Crafts in Northern Michigan

When you live in a climate that includes 4-6 months of winter, there's more to summer than just warm days. Any outdoor activities  - class reunions, weddings, fairs - get crammed into our 12-16 snowless weekends (notice I didn't say warm - just without snow).

The Elk Rapids Arts & Crafts Fair

Hands down one of my favorite summer activities is the arts and crafts fair. I'm lucky enough to live in a community that hosts one every month, May-August. Our May 25 fair was a bit chilly (notice the coats and jeans!), but the sun was out and the vendors showed up, so Linda and I grabbed our friends, Hope and Joy, then made our way downtown.

Our blacksmith friend (I forgot to get his name!)

Joy's favorite was this blacksmith. We could have stayed there all day without her complaining. It's hard to stay in once place, however, when you can smell the cinnamon roasted almonds a few booths down (because no fair is complete without some type of yummy snack food).

Only $2!!

My favorite part of the Elk Rapids art fair is the prices. I've been to dozens of other fairs over the years and spend most of my time drooling over pieces I'll never be able to afford. In Elk Rapids, the vendors sell everything from paintings worth hundreds of dollars (see below) to beautiful, hand-made dollar crafts for the kids (and modestly wealthy) to buy.

I admire this artist's work every year.

One of these days Linda and I will be rich, and we'll get to buy whatever we want at the arts and crafts fair, but for now we enjoy the window shopping and chatting with friends (not to mention finally getting outside after a long winter).

Joy with her new crown and flower.

Even if you don't enjoy buying hand-made artwork, the fair in Elk Rapids offers one of the most beautiful settings for any outdoor event. Walk two blocks past the fair and you end up at the beach; two blocks in the other direction takes you to the library. It doesn't matter which way you go - natural beauty surrounds the man-made beauty of the arts and crafts fair.

Linda and Hope leading the way.

 Best of all - it's a short walk home.

Another successful trip to the fair.

Book Review: A Bride for All Seasons

It all started with an ad in a mail-order bride catalogue . . .

This charming bouquet of novellas introduces you to four Hitching Post Mail-Order Bride Catalogue prospects in the year 1870, all eager for second chances . . . and hungry for happiness. Year in, year out, they'll learn that love often comes in unexpected packages.

"And then Came Spring" by Margaret Brownley
Mary-Jo has traveled halfway across the country to meet her match, arriving just in time for his funeral. Returning home seems like her only option until her would-be brother-in-law proposes a more daring idea.

"An Ever After Summer" by Debra Clopton
Ellie had no idea she's not what Matthew ordered. And what's wrong with being a "Bible thumper" anyway? She's determined to show him she's tougher than she looks-and just the girl he needs.

"Autumn's Angel" by Robin Lee Hatcher
Luvena would be perfect for Clay if she didn't come with kids. But kids are a deal breaker, especially in a rough-and-trouble mining town. ­ e trouble is, there's no money to send them back . . .

"Winter Wedding Bells" by Mary Connealy
David's convinced he's not long for the world. He needs someone to mother his boys when he's gone-nothing more. Can plucky Irish Megan convince him to work at living instead of dying?
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I picked up this book because I'm a huge fan of Mary Connealy. I've read Robin Lee Hatcher before, but wasn't as familiar with the other authors. I figured anyone paired up with Connealy must be good, so I read the novellas.

A Bride for All Seasons is exactly what I'd hoped for in a collection of novellas. Each story contained tension, romance, and a small cast of characters trying to make life work.

I've been disappointed by novella collections in the past because they tend to feel rushed, as if the authors simply cut chapters from longer books. That wasn't the case with these stories. Though short, each story provided all of the engaging plot elements I expect and enjoy in full length novels. This also gave me a chance to meet some new authors (who I will probably read in the future, now that I've sampled their styles).

An easy, entertaining read full of tricky situations and sweet romance.

*I received a free copy of this book from Thomas Nelson in exchange for an honest review. These opinions are strictly my own.

Reading Reviews: 12 Days of Christmas in Elk Rapids

##Reading Reviews has moved from my writing blog to this blog. In the future you'll find all book reviews here:##

I won't lie - this isn't a book review. It's a shameless plug. I love Christmas. I love Elk Rapids. I love young writers who pursue their dreams. For that reason I'm dedicating this month to a few elementary aged writers who put together a little book about one of my favorite places. Here's the scoop:

This book was written as a tribute to the beautiful village of Elk Rapids, Michigan. Mrs. Veith's third graders from Lakeland Elementary School worked as a team to brainstorm all the wonderful things that our village provides for us. The third graders than continued to research the topics that they choose to complete a page in our 12 Days of Christmas in Elk Rapids book. All the illustrations were also completed by these hard working third graders. This book shares many of the wonderful things that our great village has to offer and why Elk Rapids, Michigan is a great place to visit and live.

I can pretty much guarantee there will be telling. Don't expect any deep point-of-view. Ignore the passive to-be verb. Take a few minutes and celebrate with some Elk Rapids 3rd graders who get to see their book in print. (If you want to get your hands on a copy, you can order it here.)
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Wolfsbane by Ronie Kendig: Book Three of the Discarded Heroes series - perhaps a little risque for a Christian novel, but she presented realistic drama in a well-written, non-graphic way. Faith didn't seem as important in this book, but still a large piece of the plot. Just as exciting and suspenseful as the first two books. A great example of Kendig's style.***

Old Man & the Sea by Ernest Hemingway: The first Hemingway book I've ever read. It took a while to get used to - the older writing style is completely opposite of what I've been taught is good writing. Not my cup of coffee, but I would definitely recommend it to my husband.***

Dead Dancing Women by Elizabeth Kane Buzzelli: A fun book because it's set in a small town that used to exist near where I live. The plot, however, was a little unbelievable and it read like it wasn't sure if it wanted to be a literary novel or genre. Not my favorite book, but not the worst I've ever read. **

Book Review (and Giveaway!): Talon by Ronie Kendig

All Air Force veteran Aspen Courtland wants is her brother back. The US Marine Corps says he’s dead, but Aspen won’t believe it till she sees his body. Her only hope is her brother’s tracking dog, Talon, but a brutal attack has left the dog afraid of his own shadow.

The truth is something Military Intelligence Operative Dane Markoski has never faced. But now it’s the only thing that can save him—along with Talon’s help. But working with Talon means teaming up with Aspen as well, and Dane swore he’d never work with a woman.

Eventually they join forces to battle the elements and extremists. But if Talon can’t rise up to his former glory for one last mission, the only outcome for all three will be game over.
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Ronie Kendig consistently provides fast-paced plots, flawed-but-trying characters, and a bit of tortured romance in her military thriller books. Talon is no exception. From the very first page her expertly-trained characters engage, fighting the enemy as well as their demons. Kendig has a knack for including multiple points-of-view, so you have to pay attention while you're reading, but the different angles keep your attention and give a wider view of the unfamiliar landscape of special ops and military intrigue.

My only issue with the novel is the full-throttle intro, but this is a reflection of the industry, not Kendig. I understand that there's a push to start the story with a bang (literally in Kendig's work), but the immediate action with no character introduction always leaves me feeling lost and confused. Technically Kendig masterfully wrote the opening action, but it took me 40+ pages before the story really pulled me in because I felt like I was trying to keep up. Again, that's not a reflection of the author, but I wanted to mention it. If you're like me you may struggle through the first 40-50 pages, but stick with it. Kendig's stories are worth it.
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Leave a comment with your email address included for a chance to win a copy of Talon. The winner will be randomly selected on June 17 - good luck!

Cupcakes and Presents and Babies, Oh My!

The Decor

Since she moved in, Linda has bonded with most of my friends. She's not just my Aunt Linda, she's everyone's Aunt Linda.

One of her favorite people is my friend Shaina. Linda met Shaina seven years ago at my wedding. She's been part of the family ever since. When she told us she was expecting, Linda went into super-aunt mode:

Some of the party guests!

She volunteered our house for the baby shower, volunteered my services at the hospital, and even volunteered to change some diapers and babysit. Linda is a very excited adoptive-great-aunt.

Is that a pacifier with a mustache on top?! Yes it is.

 Linda regularly checks in on Shaina, following up on doctor appointments and such. She's been especially concerned with the shower. Together with our friend Hope, we've planned everything ... we just didn't check the calendar.

No words needed.

 Somehow we managed to plan the shower for the weekend that Linda's out of town! Seriously, what kind of friends are we??

No worries, though. With a few bucks and a little planning, we pulled of a mini-surprise shower!

Our youngest attendees.

Linda and I made cupcakes, Hope's fam provided the dinner. I bought some balloons. Hope picked up some guests. Everyone brought presents and viola! Instant baby shower, for Linda as much as it was for Shaina.

Photo bombed by the four year-old.

 The food was great, the company was charming, the weather was perfect, and, most importantly, Linda got to spoil one of her dozens of adopted nieces. Shaina was a sport, adding another party to her already packed schedule.

Shaina & Linda

Linda is definitely not one to let a little thing like 100 miles stop her from enjoying a good party. All she needs is a little time, a wee bit of help, and she can make anything happen.

Coming Soon - July 2013

And now the countdown to baby begins. Linda's already cleared a space on her dresser for a picture of Shaina, the baby, and their cat. She doesn't have a picture of me, of course, but Shaina already has a place reserved. Gotta love Aunt Linda.

It's Not My Fault That I Want a Dog

Photo Credit

I want a dog.

I blame this on Animal Planet's show Too Cute!. My aunt and I started watching this a few months ago when they would run marathon days - hours of puppies and kittens frolicking on the big screen. Though the kittens amuse me, my two cats have already fulfilled that need. What I need now is a puppy. Too bad my husband isn't completely on board, but I understand his hesitation.

Right now we care for our two cats, plus my aunt lives with us, so the house is pretty full. We haven't had any luck training the cats to get a job, so they still rely solely on us for food and litter. I imagine a dog will be the same. As much as I'd love to cuddle with my very own fuzz bucket, I don't want to worry about where everyone will sleep or how we'll afford all the food.

Then there are my family members and friends. Allergies run rampant amongst my tribe. Three of my favorite folks rarely (if ever) come over because of the cats. I don't want to alienate anyone else because of a dog. Furry friends are nice, but I truly value my biped acquaintances. I'm not sure that I'm willing to sacrifice them for a walking companion (though there are times when I'd gladly trade in a human for a wagging tail).
There's also the whole poop thing - I'm not touching it. My husband has a friend who trained his dog to poop in the woods. If I ever did get a dog, I'd need to do that. I can handle messy diapers and projectile vomit, but I'm not going to pick up poop.

Photo Credit

As often as I try to talk myself out of it, however, I always end up at a friend's house (or back at Animal Planet) and some sweet, playful face captures my heart and makes me forget all of the negatives about canine ownership. I really do want a dog, but I don't want to upset the peaceful balance at our house. I could never go to the pound and walk home with a puppy when I know that my hubby isn't 100% behind the idea, so I'm waiting (and wanting). If someone should show up at our house, however, and anonymously drop off an orphaned spaniel puppy, well ... I just want a dog.

So long, dear cows!

Aunt Linda has yet to meet an animal she doesn't love. I haven't had to worry about my cats since she moved in. (To be honest, when she was gone one weekend I forgot to feed the cats until they started howling.) Knowing how much she loves animals, I knew she'd enjoy going with me to the farm.

 

The farm greeters. They were looking for a treat - they remember Linda because she always knows where to find the box of dog treats.

This is part of the dairy herd. Off-and-on for about two years we had the privilege of owning part of this herd, so we enjoyed fresh, raw milk every week. Things have changed, however, so the cows are finding new homes. We wanted to take some pictures before we said good-bye.

Linda could usually get the older cows (above) to moo at her. The calves (below) never gave us the time of day.

Except this little guy (or girl?). He would run out to see us whenever we stopped by. He usually turned away once he realized he didn't have food, but this week he let Linda pet him for a while.

We certainly had fun visiting our bovine friends. We'll miss 'em, but Linda's not too worried. She's already found another horse ranch she'd like me to check out with her!

Hug & Groom

Last month I spent four days down with a cold. Normally that's not a big deal, but the week before that Linda had a cough. We spent most of the week at the house while she recovered, then we spent four days at the house while I fought a bug. When I finally felt better I was four days behind in my work and couldn't afford another day off, so I called my sister in law.

I asked my SIL, Beth, if she'd mind taking Linda out somewhere - a movie, to the mall, anything outside of my house. The timing was perfect. Beth was already planning on going to the PEACH Ranch Hug & Groom event.

"PEACE Ranch is a faith based equine assisted therapy center founded on the belief that there is great potential for healing in the parallel process of rescue, rehabilitation and restoration between horses and humans." Every so often they host a Hug & Groom - two hours when people can walk through to meet and pet the animals.

This is an event designed for Linda! She's yet to meet an animal that she doesn't like, and the Hug & Groom was no different. This fellow shown above developed a particular fondness for her.

It was this little pony, however, that captured Linda's heart. We're looking forward to the next event (hopefully sans snow) so we can go back and she can introduce me to all of her new friends.

And a big thanks to Beth for not only getting Linda out of the house, but for introducing her to her favorite horse!

Pizza Pull Apart Bread ... Modified (of course)

I found this fun look recipe on Facebook for Pizza Pull Apart Bread. As is my custom, I followed the directions the first time. As is usually the case for FB recipes, I found it incomplete and not quite right, so I've modified it for better results in the future.

Here's what you need:
2 cans of pizza dough (or enough homemade dough for two pizzas)
6 oz. of pepperoni
1/3 cup olive oil
Spices
8 oz. shredded cheese

Here's what you do:

Roll out and cut up your pizza dough.

Roll you dough pieces into bite-sized dough balls.

Toss dough balls with olive oil seasoned with spices (I used an Italian blend, but forgot to take a picture).

Layer ingredients in bundt pan or fluted angel food cake pan: dough, pepperoni, cheese. End with dough (I used some biscuits that I had on hand, thus the weird looking top). Bake at 375 degrees (the recipe didn't include a time - I went for 20 minutes because I had no idea).

Dump bread onto plate.

Pull apart (my pepperoni is locally made without all of the artificial colors, thus the brownish tone).

Serve with marinara (and I added ranch!)

The recipe was okay, but incomplete. Here's what you should do:
2 cans of pizza dough (or enough homemade dough for two pizzas)
6 oz. of pepperoni, diced
Assorted favorite pizza toppings, diced
1/3 cup olive oil
Spices
8 oz. shredded cheese
Marinara
Ranch Dressing
Bundt pan or angel food cake pan

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
2. Cut pizza dough into bite size pieces and roll into balls; coat with seasoned olive oil
3. Layer ingredients in pan: dough, toppings, cheese. Make sure your last layer is dough. (NOTE: If using an angel food cake pan you will only have four layers - dough, toppings, cheese, dough. A bundt pan creates more layers)
4. Bake for 30 minutes; check for done-ness. Bake until golden and crusty.
5. Cover pan with plate; flip over to remove bread.
6. Serve with your favorite dips!