He did it!!

I actually got Matt to post 8 things from being tagged! Mind you he won't tag anyone, because he doesn't know anyone with a blog, but he answered the questions! Take a peek...http://www.mattsmiracle.blogspot.com

Chalk It Up to Experience

There are certain things in this life that we should never have to experience: a third cancer diagnosis or losing someone to a drunk driver. I pray that none of you reading this will undure such tragedies. I also pray that you will never experience what I am about to describe...may God be merciful to you all.

In early June my husband and I took the kids (Midgie and Bucket...cats...see previous posts) to my parents' house with us. We let them free roam the car, as they like to cuddle. On our way home we left at 4:45 am to take Matt straight to work at 6:00 am. As it was early, Matt drove and I leaned back to sleep. Midgie was really having a hard time, but she usually calms down. She was climbing up and down my midsection, not unusual, as I tried to sleep. After a minute or so she farted...something nasty. As I sat up to throw her in the back seat I screamed. Not fart...poop...on my chest.

Matt reacted by shoving her to the floor. She hadn't finished her poo poo yet, so it smeared along the car door and dashboard. I am still screaming. I manage to pull my shirt off and dispose of it along the highway (yes...I littered). Matt held Midgie while I ... wiped her a%# to get the stuff off. Then I wiped my hands...and the door...and the dashboard...and my purse. Needless to say, when I called Matt's boss to tell him why Matt would be late to work, he laughed pretty hard.

Fast forward: July 24th. No more cats pooping on me. This time, the kids are sharing a cage. I put 'em in the back seat and head out. Not twenty minutes from home I smell it...cat fart. Ten minutes later its still lingering. Panicked, I pull over and look into the carrier...where two cats are covered in cat poop. I'll spare you the details...just know that I successfully kept the poo off my clothes and the car fabric (I won't tell you how). I'm contemplating how to transport the cats in the future, since they obviously can't be trusted to wander the car OR travel in a carrier, when I smell it again. This time, the cats are crying. For the second time in one day, the third time in less than two months, I am on the side of the road, repressing my gag reflex as I find myself up to my elbows in feline feces. I am sick of poop.

My cats are still at my parents house now. My folks don't want to keep the cats. I don't think I own enough paper towels to transport them again. I'm considering cutting holes in some Pampers to pull their tails through...I can't do the poop thing again.

And so I pray that you will spared such an experience, that your travels will be easier than mine and your pets far less smelly.

I've been tagged...

and not by the DNR. I was tagged by CCG...my sister. Okay, lemme post the rules and we'll see what I can do:

The Rules: “Each person posts the rules before their list, then they list 8 things about themselves. At the end of the post, that person tags and links to 8 other people and then visits those peoples’ sites and comments letting them know that they have been tagged, and to come read the post, so they know what they have to do.”

Okay, first of all: I don't know how to do the links...I guess I'll give it a whirl. Secondly, I regularly check four blogs...three of which are owned by our very own Camille! I'll do what I can. And now, for eith thing you may not know about me:

1. I'm seriously considering vegetarianism...but I like turkey bacon. I've LOVED the health benefits of cutting out the meat and avoid it now at all costs. Unless its turkey bacon...yum.

2. I want four kids, and I have a gut feeling they will all be boys, but I'm hoping for at least one girl. If I have one girl, I want her to come first. I WILL not raise any momma-sissy girl.

3. Contrary to popular belief (Michelle), I very much enjoy fashion and LOVE clothes. However, I also love not being in debt. I don't wear bad clothing because I don't have any fashion sense...I wear them because I can't afford a new wardrobe each season.

4. I still harbor deep desires to sing the national anthem at a Red Wings game, have a role in at least one major motion picture, appear on Broadway and write a good novel.

5. I still want to get my ph.D...I just don't know what I would study.

6. I want to travel to China and Russia and do God's work.

7. Someday I will pray over people and see blind eyes opened, tumors disappear and the dead raised (that's not desire...I'm declaring that as a fact!)

8. I have an unfounded fear of lifting a toilet seat lid and finding a decapitated head in the bowl (or of forgetting to stand up on a plane and having my butt sucked in).

Okay, so who can I tag?? Dianna, umm...Matt...and I'm going to determine that Beth needs to create a blog to answer this as well...Sorry, don't have anything better than that. And now, since blogger doesn't seem to let me post comments...lemme figure out how I'm going to do this...

This post has no constant theme...

I just finished another book (three books actually, but I'm only commenting on one). It was okay. I finished it because I like to finish things that I start, but it really didn't intrigue me that much. It seemed kinda whiny; I wasn't that into it. By the end I thought I'd blog about the author and how I think she's whiny and don't really care for her writing style.

Then I went to her website.

I could have written her home page...substitute my name in anyplace you see hers. It kinda freaked me out. "I WANT TO WRITE TOO!" I'm screaming inside, but then I think..."I just don't want to write like you do." One part of me was SO excited to find a woman with whom I can relate so well...and the other part of me wonders, if she thinks she's funny (and I don't) then could I also publish books as "humorous" only to find out they...aren't? I guess its a risk that I have to face. Am I up for the challenge? Am I ready for the rejection?

I have to be ready for the rejection. One of my favorite teachers has a saying: "Do it afraid". If I'm scared of being rejected, that's normal...I have to do it anyway. In fact, I thank God for the rejection I have faced in the past, for I believe it has really strengthened me and prepared me for this venture. I spoke with a friend last night who, sadly, is currently swimming in the pain of personal rejection...one that involves her heart. I've been there. It's hard to want to pick up and go on. It's even harder to want to put yourself back into a position where you could be rejected AGAIN. But then I look at my husband :) I've never known such love, patience or adoration...and I could have missed out on all of that by being afraid of the pain of rejection. My friend: hang in there. I pray that you will allow yourself to heal, and try again.

And for me? If my friend is willing to risk her most precious of gifts, her heart, and try again then what's to stop me from worrying about some stupid ol' book?!?

Oh, and for now my "writer's blog" is going to turn into a collection of book reviews, until I have something of my own that I can put up there for reading. Just a reminder, it is: www.therehastobeabeginning.blogspot.com

Visitin' Vegas

Okay, so these are all of the pix you're going to get for right now. I've spent the past 45 min. trying to upload five different pictures, and its just not working...maybe later :( Sorry. But this is what I've got so far! Me and my girls, Sarah Nancy and Ella Grace! I can't help it that they love me...I have that hypnotic effect on kids :) Vegas was blazin' hot, packed full of stuff to do and busy, busy, busy - but it was fun too! I got to stay with the Gabels, so each morning and night for me included the kid-lets. As you'll see by later pix (I hope) there was also a lot of pool time :) And I didn't burn once! Woo hoo!

Okay, I gotta each lunch now...later!

Finally, NYC pictures!

Okay, this picture thing is really bugging me, but I'm trying!To the left, we have the theater where I would've seen Mary Poppins...if Shaina had been with me :) It used to be to the right, but now someplace floating around is a pic of the Chrysler Building dwarfing my cute-as-a-button honey (if he ever reads this he probably won't appreciate the button thing, but I don't even think he knows how to access this blog...hee, hee). Somewhere on this post (I'm not exactly sure where, the pictures just seem to pop in where ever they want to without first clearing it with me) you'll see my experience at, yummy-yummy, Rice to Riches!! And then a few photos of the fam at the wedding! More pix and posts later!

New York, New York!

So, I had my first ever trip to Manhattan last month! My brother-in-law married a peach of a gal on June 16th and the fam headed out for a few days. Though busy with wedding details all day Friday and Saturday, Matt and I did schedule some time to explore on Thursday. It was so much fun! We went everywhere, from Central Park to Wall Street to Times Square...one day is NOT enough time! My sorority sis Jen and her hubby Rob were fabulous hosts and put us up for four nights...in a 450 sq. ft. apartment! It was such a blessing to have a safe place to crash and someone familiar for suggestions and directions.

The two things I really wanted to do were go see a show (which we didn't do, but maybe next time) and go to Rice to Riches. It's a rice pudding shop that I saw in the movie Hitch...and its SOOOOOO good! (It's in Nolita, for those of you interested...North Little Italy). Anyway, here are some photos for your enjoyment!

:( I've tried four times to add pictures...I'll try again tomorrow. Sorry :(

For the record: I tried to title this, but it wouldn't let me. More quirks for blogger to figure out for me :()

Coming soon...

I've been quite the traveler recently! I've got pix to post from NYC and Vegas...but since I'm still in Vegas and my NYC pix are on my laptop in TC, you'll have to wait. But make you come back! There are some good ones :)

Uh, research??

I need to be stopped. And beaten into submission.

I started off strong! I was working on my writings, getting creative, trying to tap into that right have of my brain (which, for the left brainer, will always bug me that it controls the left side of my body).

However, not feeling confident of my skills (despite my AMAZING cheering section in Dundee, Michigan...yes, they have a Cabela's, can we move on??), I decided I needed to look into what publishers want in a book. I needed to do some research. FINE!!! I've been reading novels for the past four days - SUE ME!! I'm averaging one a day right now, and I still have time to make 3 meals a day, do laundry, clean the house, spread mulch and kill the lawn mower (don't tell Matt I said that...he doesn't like it...thinks I'm cursing myself to forever ruin lawn mowers). Seriously, it only takes me about 5 hours to read a 220 page novel...does that make me odd? Do you find me...fruity?!?

FINE!!! I'm a freak...ishly cute girl. I know. Time to pick up the computer and let the creative juices flow...basically because I've already read all of my library books...

To be a writer

First, let me say that I am VERY disappointed in the lack of response to my "Choose-your-own-adventure" episode of the Gilmore Girls. Apparently you all enjoyed the series finale. Sigh. I must continue on...

So, I've known for a while now that I need to get my butt into gear and start writing...I just don't know exactly what it IS that I'm supposed to write. I even started my own blog dedicated to my writings! And nothing has ever been posted to it; I've actually forgotten how to access it. Regardless, it doesn't change the fact that I KNOW I need to start writing for a REASON.

Could someone please give me a reason??

I mean, let's be honest, some of the funniest stuff you'll read today will be on this blog (just being humble here). I've been complimented time and again on my abilities and encouraged to get out there and WRITE about something! Submit something! Make my education start to pay for itself (DISCLAIMER: If it does pay for itself I do not make any promises to any financial contributors that they will be reimbursed for educational funds...sorry dad). But where do I start? Does anyone have any ideas? What do you want to know about??

These are the things about which I have a lot to write:
- Movies
- Life in a 3-daughter family
- Life in a small town (incidentally, Winchestertonfieldville is the largest city I've ever lived in!!)
- Newly-wed status
- God
- Nothing (I could do a pretty decent column along the lines of the TV show Seinfeld - week after week about nothing)

I don't know that there's really much more to discuss. Even though I can write about those things, are any of you really out there biting your nails WAITING to hear my opinion on them?! Yeah, I didn't think so. Yet you endure...you return again and again to read my ramblings (at least my older sister does...for all I know she could be the only person reading - RIGHT ON SISTER!!)

That's my plea - let me know if you have any ideas, k? I'm really pretty good at this typing thing...it only takes me about 2.5 days to finish a post!!! (Kidding...I can usually finish in two)

Gilmore Girls...rewritten

So, late last night I was telling my hubby about the series finale to "Gilmore Girls" (a moment of reverential silence please). I admit, I haven't seen the final episode, but I've heard about it. However, I was hoping for a different ending. I got to wondering - what were YOU hoping would happen in the last show?? Here are our ideas (DISCLAIMER: Matt was slap happy, tired, and wondering where the "kitty titties" were on our male cat)

Karin: I wanted to see Loreli marry ANYONE, be happy...and get pregnant!! Really, the whole point of the series was the mother/daughter relationship. It would've been GREAT to see Rori move away and Loreli start again:)

Matt: He was hoping to see the car wash blow up and level the whole town. When I explained that the town didn't have a car wash, he thought it would be good to have the town build one first and THEN watch it blow up.

What did you want to see?

Referral

Please see the new post at www.mattsmiracle.blogspot.com
:)

Addendums

To Rebuttal:
I like guns for hunting and for the police to protect me. I'm not insinuating that really anyone should have an automatic weapon at home. Really...how fast and how many bullets do you need to kill a deer??

To Mom:
She also gets homemade chocolate truffles!!

My mom's better than your mom!!!

So say the good folks at 101.9 Sunny Country in beautiful Traverse City, MI. These fine folks have declared my mom THE BEST mom of all the entries they received for their "Mother Load" contest. And WHY did they select her?! Primarily because of her AMAZING daughter (that would be me). I mean, if it wasn't for me she wouldn't have been entered, right?? Okay, so maybe she did a few little things that made me consider writing in. In no particular order, here are some of the reasons I detailed:

-raised three daughters AND was legal guardian for her sister AND her mother (who were physically and/or mentally unable to care for themselves)
-never missed a basketball, volleyball or softball game
-never missed a band or choir performance
-never missed a play (even went to the dress rehearsals!!)
-made breakfast for us EVERY MORNING while we were in school (even on tournament days when there were extra kids in the house)
-made sure we were always on time
-volunteered for GOP and Right to Life
-never took a sick day

Wow!! The bar has been set pretty high! And since, for about eight years, she sacrificed her Mother's Day to help strike play sets I figured I would brag on her for a while...and what a pay off! Tell her what she won Bob!

Lorraine, you and one guest will receive a free overnight accommodation at the Holiday Inn on West Bay in spectacular Traverse City, MI. you will also receive a complimentary bottle of champagne at check-in, breakfast in bed the next day, a spa certificate, Mother's Day brunch for four and four movie passes to Carmike Cinemas!!

Thanks Bob.

Love you mom!!!

My rebuttal

Gosh darn that stupid blogger that won't let me respond to anyone else's blog!!!

Okay, my sister has admitted to having liberal tendencies - AND SHE HAS ACCUSED ME AS WELL!! Humphh. I need to respond.

I am a registered Republican. I will ONLY vote for a Democrat if God were to instruct me to do so. I would rather not place a vote than to vote for a Democrat. I am okay with guns (I can hear the sharp intakes and expulsions of air as my faithful readers gasp, sigh and shout profanities). I don't believe everything the government tells me (be it Democratic OR Republican). I eat well.

Here's the deal...I eat well. I don't like chemicals. I don't like additives. I don't like greed. I LOVE God!!! I can't help but look at His word and wonder why there aren't any stories about ADHD, cancer or manic-depressive disorder. There were sick people healed, demon-possessed people delivered...but no such diseases. Now I haven't suffered these ailments, but I've read about those who have. These are the things I tend to see: (EXAGGERATED FOR DRAMATIC EFFECT)

"I received chemo for cancer. I lost all of my hair, was sick for a year and a half, had horrible abdominal cramping, uncontrollable gas, acne, tooth decay and ingrown toe nails. But it was all worth!!! Now the cancer is technically 'in remission', not gone, and even though I'm physically scarred, have had vital organs removed and will never be able to smell or grow toe nails again (not to mention I'll be taking 14 various pills daily for the rest of my life) - I feel GREAT!"

Hmmmm. And then I read:

"I was diagnosed with cancer. I stopped eating humanly-altered foods and went to an organic, all-natural, the-way-God-created-it diet and the cancer is not only gone, but my hair grew back thicker and shinier, my acne cleared up and I got pregnant when the doctor said I never would!"

Does that make me liberal? No...I think 'smart' is the right word. And the true heart of the decision?

God. Yep. Stick with what He put into play and life will always work out.

Now that I think about it, I was offended at being called a liberal, but I have the cure for that. AS SOON AS THE LIBERALS FIND OUT I'M A SPIRIT-FILLED, IN-LOVE, ON-FIRE CHRISTIAN THEY'LL RUN SCREAMING IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!!!

Okay, so I guess its not that bad.

Amazing Me

I'm amazing, and I can't tell you why. I'm the best sister in the world. Can't tell you why. I'm one heck of a friend. Can't tell you why. As I'm writing this I wonder...if I've done all of these great things about which I can't tell you, are they really great? Hmmm...

Michigan: The Tease Me State

I'm considering a petition to my state government to change our state slogan from The Wolverine State to The Tease Me State (hey...the "Show Me" state?!?) This is my reasoning:

Thursday - high 60's
Thursday night/Friday morning - 30's
Saturday - 70's
Saturday night - 60's
Sunday - 80's!!! (woo hoo)
Sunday night - 70's
Monday morning - 70's
Later Monday morning - 60's
Monday - 60's
Tonight's forecast - 30's!!

Okay...I challenge you to prove me wrong...

Here they are - my "adopted" kids!

Ohhhh!!! I spent spring break in Port Huron with all of my "adoptive" kids...my sorority sister's and their kidlets :) It was too much fun!! So, here they are...all my little chi-chis :) Top center we have, slightly hidden, Isabella ("Bella"), Baby Aidan ("Wubie") and Olivia ("Livi"). Yes, they are in pink water :)

Next, we have their cousins...Mr. Lars on the left and big sisters Sage & Jade on the right (go ahead...guess what they do on Friday afternoons??). I even got to go with all three of them to a gymnastics field-trip...do you know how much fun it is to pull 15-20 kids under four out from the big foam pit?! Hee, hee.

So here they are! Finally, someone cute to post on my blog!!! I'd show you their momma's, my dear, dear friends, but one doesn't like photos and the other one got photoed...behind a pile of little tykes :)

Okay...I'm outtie!

Happy...Christmas??

Okay, apparently Michigan weather has the two major Christian mile-stones confused. For Christmas in 2006 we didn't need jackets or even boots. Personally, I enjoyed it :) However, it wasn't quite normal. March was fabulous, starting to warm up and enjoying the jacket-free life-style once again. And then came Spring Break..and our WINTER STORM! What?! Oh yeah, so my little sun baby niece was outside in a short sleeve shirt and shorts...this is what it looked like here this Easter. Woo hoo...yuck.

Happy Easter!!

Easter...what does that really have to do with Christ? HAPPY RESSURRECTION DAY! GLORIOUS SALVATION! Hope y'all get to celebrate life with Christ, enjoying His love and grace toward us all.

:( No good pictures yet...I'll find something good soon! In the meantime, enjoy my baby niece Ella at www.thegabelfamily.blogspot.com

Will I Ever Grow Up?

I hope not, but for right now it might be nice. As an infant I used to go right to sleep, lulled away by the sweet words "Bed Time!". Not anymore. Actually, not for many years. As I've gotten older, I've become more stubborn. Just ask my hubby. When I get really tired I tend to talk...very, very quickly. And very, very incessantly. Even as I write this it's 10:40 pm and I'm tired. I could use a good, solid night sleep, but I'm fighting it. I don't even know why. There's no one to talk to, I've already checked every website that interests me and there's nothing good on TV. Yet here I am, typing my lil' fingers off, just for the sake of typing.

I'm going to eat pizza tomorrow, for the first time in MONTHS. I'm excited. I also get to bond with the Kellerman clan some more...it's gonna be good.

Okay, I'm outtie.

My Babies

Here they are!

My lovely little lady is Midgie...Midgie Moo Moo, or just plain Moomer for those of us who know her more intimately. For quite a while she's suffered an upper respiratory infection; however, she's feeling QUITE lively and frisky these days. In fact, she's feeling SOOOO healthy that Mommy can no longer take naps...at least not without Midgie running up and down and up and down and up and down Mommy's legs, arms, head...you get the picture.

To the right is my big boy. This handsome fellow is Bucket: he enjoys long naps in the window, wrestling with his little sister and annoying his Momma with early morning nibbles on exposed fingers and ears. He's now weighing in at 12 lbs and is hoping to break 15 lbs by his first birthday.

Since we don't have any human kids, these will be my pictures for a while...I'll try to get some other fun stuff too!!

My new camera's here! My new camera's here!

I'm SOMEBODY! (Thanks Steve Martin)

So, I just got my brand new 7.2 mega pixel digital camera!! Whee!! Unfortunately, Matt's out of town and I can't get the cats to sit still long enough to get a good shot, so I don't have anything fun to post yet. However, I may soon introduce you to The Clampets Came to Williamsburg...just not yet. I just wanted to whet your appetite...photos coming soon!

Why do they call them "conveniences"?

Modern conveniences? I think not. As the world rolls on each day we create more and more ways to make life easier...and 400 ways in which that convenience can break down and send us plummetting beyond the dark ages.

In case you haven't met them yet, I have the most ADORABLE nieces! Sarah and Ella (see them both at www.thegabelfamily.blogspot.com). Sarah came into my life when she was four years old; now, she is growing into young womanhood and is quite social and active. I don't get to see her nearly enough, but I try to stay in touch. She is in PA with her mom, stepdad and new baby sister. I have some pictures...I should put them up.

On the other side of the country is Ella. She is the first baby. She is spoiled. She is a boonchkin. As she is the off-spring of my sister, communication is more frequent. As she is the first-born to my sister, pictures are ABOUNDING. As I am on the other side of the country, I DEMAND lots of pictures posted on-line so I can watch her grow from a distance. Did you SEE the swimming pictures?!?! Oooo....

Well, I thought it would be great to finally comment and let my brother-in-law see that people DO look at their family blog and a photo documentary of Ella's first year is more than appreciated by some of us. Yes...that's when modern conveniences stepped in to help out!

Okay...I cannot post a comment annonymously. Sure, not a problem. I'll just put my name. Wait...no name, just your account information. Do I have a blogger account? (FYI - I maintain 497,839 blogs from the same email address. I'm geting to know these people well). Well that shouldn't be a problem, let me just type in my info...verify my login? Hmmm. If I have to, I guess I'll press this icon...what? Where am I now? This account has not been activated? Maybe I messed up, lemme try this again. Ten minutes later: I KNOW THAT LOGIN IS UNAVAILABLE - IT'S MINE! I'M JUST TRYING TO LOG IN!!!

And so, no comment. Frustrated and confused that I have somehow been lost in the vast pit that is cyberspace, I rush frantically to my blog dashboard knowing full well that I posted things earlier this week and hoping I can still get back in! NO problem :) All 400,000 blogs, still up and running. Apparently the folks at google and blogger don't mind my smart-%$# blogs, they just don't want my smart-&%@ comments.

Errr. (If you're a frequent viewer you may remember that I ranted and raved about technology about a year ago too...). I'm too worked up to go on now. Okay, I'm calming down. I'm gonna leave for a while. I don't even wanna get started on the stupid pop can deposit in the state of Michigan and how everyone is more than willing to take your $1.20 per 12 pack, but they can refuse to take your cans back for any of a zillion reasons because the companies (let's call them Cepsi and Poke) can refuse to take the cans, so we're paying all kinds of money that we'll never get back because I guess they can't recycle a can with some dirt, but my husband could tell you otherwise, but I'm just rambling now...(the title all makes sense now, doesn't it?)

Matt's Miracle...take a look

Hey folks, more news on Matt's medical condition. Check it out at www.mattsmiracle.blogpsot.com

Death of a Cat Post

After 12 months of distinguished service it is with great sadness and a humble heart that I announce the untimely departure of the Cat Tree. Originally purchased for Inky and Saber Booy, they self-lessly willed the 8', multi-tiered pole to our baby girl Roo. Though Roo loved the tree, and Inky & Saber tolerated it, it was never as loved as by Midgie & Bucket. More than a scratching post, it served as a bed away from home, an excellent piece of exercise equipment as well as a toy and playmate.

The cat post will be laid to rest in the American Waste garbage tote in Westchestertonfieldville this afternoon. A small reception will follow immediately following.

What a GREAT day!!!

Wow! What a great day!!! FIRST - I JUST got my new laptop. Woo hoo!! (Homer Simpson)

For my birthday I combined birthday money, gift cards and a store credit to put towards a Sony Vaio. I was still short but my WONDERFUL, HANDSOME, COMPASSIONATE husband told me not to worry about it...he pitched in the rest of the money for my birthday!! :) (SOOOO many reasons I married that man).

And then - AS IF THE COMPUTER ISN'T ENOUGH - Matt called today to tell me about some tickets his boss gave him...TO THE RED WINGS GAME THIS SUNDAY!!! Yes, that's right! I will be going to the Wings game in TWO DAYS!! Until then, boy will I learn everything about this beauteous machine :)

I feel so competent

I've never considered myself a great driver. I mean, I drive out of necessity, for no other reason. If I could translate myself daily I would never get into a car again, but I must endure.

HOWEVER! This past week I've realized that, no matter how much I hate driving, I am by no means the worst driver in the world. Lemme tell you about my encounters with Vanity Girl and Time to Retire.

First, Vanity Girl. 2/5/07 - every school from Holland up to Central Lake, from Ludington over to Gaylord, is closed. It's 3 degrees with a wind chill 15-25 below zero; visiblity is sketchy and the roads are sheet ice because its too cold for the salt to work. I'm going to run errands and am stuck behind vanity girl. On the above day she is driving her friend across town, but she feels unpretty. She decides to put on MASCARA while DRIVING on SHEET ICE!!! But it gets better...when she's done, she puts her glasses back on. I maintain a safe 14 car-length distance...

Next, Time to Retire. 2/6/07 (My birthday, thank you very much) - schools are meeting, but its still cold as an iceberg. Pulling out of Do-It-Best hardware on Zimmerman Rd. is a cute couple, granny and gramps driving their 26' long Cadillac-Towncar-Lesabre beast of an automobile. I can barely feel my toes with the heat on in my car. They are driving down the road, single digits mind you, with their back driver side door WIDE OPEN! I took a quick peak...nothing in the backseat. Just a wide open door. I hope someone caught up with them...

It's about that time...

I don't really have anything to post, but I figured I should put something up here. It's been almost a month! On the plus side, no one is puking (yeah!). That's pretty much it...not much else to detail right now. I promise, if anything exciting happens I WILL let you know :)

Merry Christm..HUAHHHH!!!!

Merry Christmas!

I'm at my parents house this year and the place is PACKED!! We've got 8-10 adults at any given time, 2 kids and 5 cats. With only four bedrooms and two full bathrooms, its a tight squeeze. Especially this year...

We've got a few family traditions that I look forward to each year (in detail in one of my previous posts), but just to recap: opening gifts on Christmas Eve, Shrimp & Baby Back ribs...I enjoy them. However, in the recent years we've adopted a new tradition that we'd all like to elminiate as it seems to escalate with each passing year. For the last 4-5 Christmases someone is ALWAYS sick. [Please stop reading if you have a weak constitution] I'm not just talking "take two Tylenol and call me in the morning" sick; I mean crumpled on the couch, rolled in a ball, blowin' it out from both ends kind of sick. And its getting worse.

Lets review the most memorable years. I think it was 2003 and I had to share a room with Cammie. She and my mom both got sick that year. I got to share a room with her as she spent the night rocking on her bed moaning, "Oh God, oh God, oh God. I'm gonna die. Violet (her cat), Violet, I'm gonna die." That was a fun night for me. Got up the next morning and Michelle and my dad tried their hands at the Christmas Roast. Please Mom, don't get sick again.

Last year Cammie was pregnant. For three months she ate and puked up apples...Christmas was no exception.

And now we can add the great epidemic of 2006: the "It-wasn't-the-turkey Outbreak". Once again (I'm seeing a trend here) Cammie got things started; a few hours later she took out my husband, Matt. We thought it was the turkey they'd eaten. No one else had eaten it and no one else was sick - we're safe :) Yeah right. We dropped like flies: Karin, Mom, Sarah, Aunt Linda. Right now we're in a holding pattern, but there are more people coming tonight so we might be able to take a few more out with us!!!

As I thought about ways to commemorate this "happy occassion" I've decided to hand out the 2006 Puke Prizes. Here are our winners:

Fearless Leader: Cammie (thanks for getting it started)
Cutest: Sarah
Loudest: Matt (yeah, the neighbors called to thank us for sending him home)
Most Graceful: Mom
Most Honest: Aunt Linda
Biggest Pain in the A#* and Panic Freak: Michelle [yeah, the only non-sick one worth mentioning]

How your Christmas was far less eventful :)

Almost ready

Okay, it's almost ready! I finally picked a blogspot name, but I don't have anything ready to publish yet. However, you can check in a week or two. The new site, set up to start (gulp) letting people read/critique my writing is:

www.therehastobeabeginning.blogspot.com

I'll see you soon :)

Facing the expectation

Wow. Here I am again, sitting at the computer, easily typing yet another blog for my site. There may be a dozen people who read this, but there may not be any. Regardless, it really is easy for me to write about nothing. I have the been blessed with the gift of bull#@&%. When it doesn't matter, when nothing is at stake I can put together as many useless words as necessary to fill a few pages.

But what if it counted? What if it meant something?

For as long as I can remember I've been writing stories. I have pages and pages of unfinished stories, started as early as the fifth grade. I wrote fantasy, romance, adventure. I even expanded some of my favorite stories, adding a ninth grade flair to Star Wars and The Three Musketeers. However, no matter what I wrote it was only for my eyes only. I've been wondering recently - supposed I let someone else read my ideas.

I don't mind keeping a blog. There's nothing I publish here that I wouldn't tell any of you to your face, but that's just my being honest in light of the current circumstances. I've been honest with my opinions, but am I secure enough to be honest with my desires? This is how my mind processes things: to tell you what I think about you/your situation requires as much courage as going to a beach in a swimsuit. To tell you what my heart and mind have created, to put it out there for your critique and possible rejection...well that's just a nude beach.

And so I wonder why I care so much. If I can be honest in one area, why not all areas? Lots of thought, lots of prayer, and I have my revelation.

I don't care about your opinion, but I'm not about to waste my time on a fruitless venture. If I'm going to let the pen loose and get the keyboard clicking then there had better be a goal, a reason for my writing. I might as well try to publish something. I used to be afraid to fail. That kept me in my room most of my life. Fear is crippling, but I'm past that. What's holding me back? Expectation. It's very liberating to realize that, just past the fear of failure lies the bog of the expectation for failure. That is truly, honestly, an icky, nasty, stinky place. So how do I get out?

I let you read it. Scary thought, but I'd rather move through the fear and allow myself to receive criticism than to stop growing and spend my life wondering.

So, I'll be publishing a new blog soon. No name yet, but I'll let you know soon.

He didn't forget me!!!

Okay, so Matt and I are in Toronto. He's been healed of cancer, we're soaking in the glory, life is good. I feel the urge to look at my engagement ring. Though I haven't cleaned it, it is sparkling. We sit in the same spot each day. Every time I look at my ring, it looks different. First it had a pink hue, then yellow. Then John Arnott explains that, just as some people get gold fillings while at TACF, some women have their costume jewelry become real gems.

Hmmmm...

So, I didn't really go public with this, but Matt didn't buy me a diamond. He bought me Moissanite (which I HIGHLY recommend...it is beautiful!!!). It is EXACTLY the ring I've always wanted and we could afford it. Well, we decided to go to a jeweler just to see if the ring is STILL Moissanite. The only way to tell is a light refraction test, which is done with a digital do-hicky. There is no real room for human error here.

Well, I happened to be in the mall today and decided to have it checked out. Now please read carefully: Matt bought a .86 karat Moissanite ring. The ladies at the store told me that, not only is my ring a DIAMOND...they believe it's a FULL KARAT!!! Oh my, oh my, oh my!!!

This is just about the most wonderful thing. It wasn't anything I asked for, expected or even ever considered, but God never forgot about me. With everything that we went through with Matt, God remembered me :) I can't wait to show y'all my new ring!!! (Honey, I love you!!!)

PLEASE: DON'T ENABLE ME!

Note to everyone: I am NOT allowed to read fiction or get cable...EVER!!! Please, I beg you. In the future I am only allowed non-fiction and televised sporting events - I MEAN IT!! Would you like to know why? Okay, here is the reason why - I GET TOO INVOLVED!!! Here are some examples:

1) I finally decided to read the sixth Harry Potter book. It's a long one. One night Matt & I went to bed and I decided to read just one more chapter (yeah, right). He glanced at the clock at 1:00 am and 2:00 am. When he rolled over at 3:00 am I told him not to look and assured him that it was late and it wouldn't happen again [mostly because I finished the book the next day].
2) 2002, Lakeland, Florida. I decided to read the Lord of the Rings for the first time ever. I started just after my birthday in February and went to Florida the first weekend in March. I stayed up so late each night reading that when I finally got to the end of the series it was about 2:30 am in a hotel room in Lakeland; I was so sleep deprived that it took me an hour to read the last few chapters because I was crying so hard that I couldn't focus on the pages.
3) And the kicker: I came to visit my sister and her new baby in Vegas. There was nothing on TV so we tossed the Gilmore Girls into the DVD player (she has seasons 1-5). Let me repeat - I GET TOO INVOLVED! I watched my first episode sometime on Oct. 25th. Today is Nov. 1st and in the past week I watched ONE HUNDRED AND TEN episodes of the Gilmore Girls! I'd never seen it before...I got sucked in...I had to see what happened...I AVERAGED THREE HOURS OF SLEEP A NIGHT SO I COULD WATCH FIVE SEASONS IN EIGHT DAYS!!! That's 4950 minutes of Gilmore Girls...82.5 hours!!! Oy vay!

This is why I can't do fiction or television. I beg you, please, DON'T LET ME NEAR EITHER OF THESE...I NEED THE REST! I am currently incapable of removing myself from the situation so I need to avoid it all together. It's too late for me in regards to Star Wars, Lord of the Rings and the Gilmore Girls as I will be eternally hooked, but please, I BEG you: if you have read a great new book or are involved in a hot new series, KEEP IT TO YOURSELF! I need to sleep. I need the rest. Besides, with friends like Luke, Han, Aragorn, Arwyn, Sookie, Rory and Michele my social calendar is already booked.

Thank you for not being an enabler.

Pumpkin, pumpkin, pumpkin

(DISCLAIMER: Thursday night Shaina & Beth would not go to Meijer with me...I had to go all by myself. This has nothing to do with my blog.)

Ah, pumpkins. I've always been a fan of pumpkin pie, but I decided to do something different this year. First up: pumpkin soup. It's actually supposed to be pumpkin and shrimp soup, but does anyone else think that sounds icky? Maybe I'll try it yet. But anyway, here are my suggestions:
- my recipe called for sauteed carrots, onions and garlic to be pureed and added to the canned pumpkin & milk. I would sautee twice as many veggies and only puree half. If you don't like shrimp with your soup it lacks substance.
- possible meat alternatives: bacon or pork or ham.
- if you don't have all spice, add extra ginger, some nutmeg and cinammon.
- it's very good with a nice piece of whole grain toast.

And my newest experiment - pumpkin cheesecake! Woo hoo!! Some GENIEUS found a way to combine pumpkin pie and cheesecake! Again, here are my ideas:
- when it calls for cream cheese to be room temperature it really means about 70 degrees. if your house is only 64 (such as mine) the cheese isn't quite soft enough. you may want to nuke it a bit for a nicer consistency (otherwise it looks like there is cottage cheese in the cake, but its still good!!)
- 1 1/2 c. graham cracker crumbs does NOT equal 20 squares (no matter what the recipe says). For the record, 20 squares yields about 2 1/2 cups of crumbs, so you will have too much crust (and no, I didn't put it all in there, but I did forget to add extra butter)
- try not to think about what's in it...it'll just ruin the experience.

If I get any more great pumpking ideas, I'll let you know, k?? (Oh...don't forget the pumpkin pancakes!!!)

We're going to the World Series!!

Woo hoo!! The last time the Tigers saw this dance I was EIGHT years old :) First the Wings, then the Pistons, now the Tigers...if only we could do something about those Pussycats...

This is gonna be a GREAT fall!!

Oooo, this is good...

You want to go visit www.mattsmiracle.blogspot.com, trust me :) Yeah, yeah, I know...I'm the wife, but I still know a good thing when I see it!!

To ramble or not to ramble, that is the question

I've recently began pondering the meaning of the life of my blog. Earlier posts give way to humor and sarcasm...an outlet to my boredom from years at the Acme Anvil Company (see previous post "Where to start?!" for history on that). I enjoy my jibberish and really don't care if anyone else does; this site helps me to feel as if my English BA, four years of my life and $80,000 weren't completely wasted. ["Why yes, my work has been published on-line..."]

However, recent events in my life have made me re-evaluate things. Am I making the best use of my time and talents? Is this the only way for me to make my voice heard, or do I have other options? One must wonder...

After much reflective time and consideration I have come to a definite conclusion: I will continue to ramble. HOWEVER - there will be a combination of ramblings. Some will be my usual serious-less information, but I am going to venture more frequently into the realm of the (dramatic pause) important stuff. Yes I know!!! Karin?? Important stuff?? It may be hard to believe, but I have realized just how much important stuff there is in the world and, after all, I do have opinions on EVERYTHING.

For now, I sign off with a large weight lifted from my chest. I know that I am doing the right thing. I believe that someday, maybe some glorious day, someone will stumble upon one of my ramblings and it will actually MEAN something to them! (sniff, sniff) Until then...

Lower and slower

Okey-dokey folks!!! Thanks for being patient :) WOW! What an awesome trip to Toronto! Matt and I just spent a much need four days soaking in the presence of God and listening for His voice (Reference - scripture tells us to "Be still...and know that [He] is God...that's where soaking comes in. Send me and email and I'll let you know more about it). We listened to some great speakers, participated in some AMAZING worship and have learned THE SECRET to becoming more Christ-like and opening the door to God's miraculous works. Are you ready for this??? Here it is -- LOWER & SLOWER.

Okay, thanks for tuning in - bye!

Just kidding...

This isn't MY message, so I don't have all of the notes and I'll just summarize (you can get resources from Ed Piorek and Heidi Baker for the in depth lessons). What do we mean by lower & slower? Do you have 28 hours worth of work to do in a 24 hour day? Get lower and slower. Are you trying to minister to your spouse, kids, parents, neighbors, friends and co-workers all while trying to maintain your own personal relationship with God? Lower and slower. Are there so many people, groups and churches that are coming to you to fill needs in their lives, while tapping into your own limited resources? Yep, lower and slower.

Have you heard the saying "You don't have time NOT to pray?"...this is it. Lower and slower. You can strive to get all of the above things done in your own time and in your own power, or you can get lower and slower. Lay on your face before your Lord...lower yourself before Him. Don't just do your church time and then bustle about your week...slow down and give Him time everyday. "But I don't have time...you don't know how much I have to do today...you don't know what my week looks like." Hmmm. Shall I tell you my week? Urologist appointment, oncologist appointment, blood work, x-rays, lab results, pharmacy, class, winterize the house, clean up the yard, pay the bills, research 10 deeds, drive to another court house...trust me, I'm as busy as the rest.

But what happens if we get lower and slower? Okay, so I spend an HOUR everyday with you Lord...what about Matt's doctor appointments? "Not a problem my child...he's healed.". Oh! Wow...but what about the house...we have to do insulation and fix the attic and do windows and..."Thank you for the time we spent together...I'm gonna send over one of my children to help you out...he's an insulation specialist." Gee, well, I guess I don't really know what to say! Um, that really gives me a lot more time...what do I do with my free time then? "Spend some more with me :)"

Okay, so you may think this sounds like a crack-head idea, but it works :) Just ask Heidi Baker...who has been healed of blood poisoning, staph, pneumonia and a million other things. She's see blind eyes opened and has had four mosques GIVEN to her because through her God converted all of the Muslims and there was no one left attending!! All because she got lower and slower.

We'll see you on the slow side folks...

Keep up on Matt's Miracle

If you are interested in hearing more about how Matt is doing, please visit:
www.mattsmiracle.blogspot.com

There can only be one...

INTRODUCTION: Please know that, because of our faith and God's gifts, we REALLY are not having a hard time with this news.

Hello there!! It's been just over nine months of wonderful wedded-ness (and for those of you who were hoping, no, there isn't a honeymoon baby here) and Matt and I have already committed first year no-nos: we moved and we both started new jobs. However, we have survived both and are even better for the experiences. As we sat back to revel in the pride and joy we've felt over our momentous achievement we continued in our spiritual walk with God and asked Him to keep growing us in Him and to keep us in the center of His plan.

Apparently there is still more for us to learn as He is allowing us to venture into a new challenge: cancer (DISCLAIMER: I am in no way claiming that God gives cancer. That is for another time. However, I am saying that He is using this unfortunate circumstance to mature us and draw us unto Him. More on that later). I know what I've heard about cancer; I know how it affects people and how they respond. I have to ask myself - is it wrong for me not to be scared? Is it okay for me to be happy? To have joy? To still be unemployed and yet be secure in the midst of God's will? HECK YES!

As I don't want this to turn into another serious, heart-heavy blog I will let you know how we are getting along. By smiling :) (A merry heart does good like a medicine!!)

So here we are - not yet to our first anniversary and I am now married to Supernut (his mild-mannered alter-ego answers to Leftie). This brave little testicle is one lone nut, performing the duty of TWO! He IS SUPERNUT!!! As the Highlander says, "There can only be one". Matt is now a proud founding member of the O.N.C. (One Nut Club) and will have t-shirts and membership cards available to the general public by June 2007. If you are interested in joining, please call 800-ONE-NUTT. Membership priviledges include a free t-shirt, travel coffee mug and your very own super hero handle.

As Matt finalizes the details for the O.N.C. we are going to stay cozy at home and rest up while he heals from his "radical extrat-omy". Any questions or concerns can be posted as comments and we will get back with you as soon as possible. Until then...it's up, up and away!!

Medium: Pink & Warm

Yep, that's me. Okay...I'm not really pink, I'm red. Four hours out on Lake Huron today and I didn't come prepared. Ah well - it's better than no sun at all, right?!

Here I am - a newly-wed for 8.5 months. After five years as an event coordinator I decided to try the 9-5 lifestyle, only to find out that I don't actually like it. So now I am gainfully unemployed (shhh...my dad doesn't know yet) and not feeling the least bit anxious. Why? How does a left-brained perfectionist step away from a sure thing and jump willfully into the unknow?

Faith. That's really it. I've got my faith in God, that He is bigger than me and my problems and He's gonna get me through. Besides, after lots of time praying about it my husband and I both felt a peace to make the jump. So here I am...flying :)

I'm really tired right now and it's not even 10 pm. I was hoping to sit down and be truly entertaining, to captivate you with my wit and intelligence. Instead, I have been sucked into "10 Things I Hate About You" and my brain is slowly shutting down for the night. Perhaps later this week, after my final interview with a company where I will blow them away with my charm and secure my next job (I RECEIVE THAT!) I'll be able to sit down and let you know how things have been.

Until then, this is my tired brain saying...blah, blah, blah.

Location Correction

Upon careful review it is Winchestertonfieldville...please excuse the slip.

Where to start?!

Wow - it's been a while! There's actually been a lot going on, a lot to get sarcastic about, but I'm not even sure where to begin!!

Perhaps the best place to start is with why I've been so hesitant to write: search engines. A while ago I posted a sarcastic little piece about my place of work. I named the company and, unknown to me, on a particular search engine it appeared as the fourth most popular site!!! Now I can name at LEAST a dozen various sites that mention this company much more frequently, yet there I was...and with such bad timing. With the company in a state of flux MANY people were searching the web for some info...and getting my sarcasm. Imagine the shock!

Imagine MY shock to discover the search engine for myself!! I immediately changed the name of the blog, but made a mistake and ended up deleting it completely :( If I can find a copy of it I will repost it...with a new name. However, what has this taught me?

First, I need to be a bit more select when refering to people and places. From now on all men will be referred to as Dick and all women will be Cybil. All cities shall be West Chestertonfieldville and all companies will be the Acme Anvil Company. I believe this will not only protect the topics of my random rants, but also cover my own butt.

Second, most people are looking for something to support their ideas/beliefs while searching on-line and not really looking at the whole picture. [DISCLAIMER: Trying to make a quasi-serious point here] One of my supervisors discovered my blog and brought it to my attention, noting the tongue-in-cheek attitude, and pointing out how that reflects on me. However, I did notice that this person didn't find the humorous blog about work (Blurred Vision), nor was it noticed that basically the ENTIRE SITE is just as it is entitled...Ramblings. I was approached as having made serious comments about serious issues...ME?!?! "I only discuss serious issues on Thursdays, between noon and two." - Lord Goring, "An Ideal Husband"

Third, I don't really have a third. I like the numbers three, five and ten, so I always try to make lists that are one of those. For example, "Ten Ways to Look Busy at Work" took me three days to write. I had about four good ideas, then I came up with two more. Well, I couldn't leave out one and go with five, and six wouldn't work, so I spent the next couple of days finalizing a Top Ten. So you see, I have to stop now so I don't have to try to come up with two or seven more ideas.

And that's that. I'll try to be more careful, but I like to write and I like to be sarcastic. This is the safest place to be both...I think. Until then, I need to prepare myself for work at the Anvil Factory...it's quite the drive from West Chestertonfieldville!

Val, where are you??

I know you check this site :) I've sent two encredibly detailed, heart-bearing emails...and they've both been returned!! Lemme know how I can reach you, k??
Love ya!

I'm in Love

And not just with Matt. I've fallen in love with the Mac. It was nothing I ever wanted to do. It was nothing I tried to do. I've always admired their looks from afar, but I'm not as shallow as that. I know that there's more to a person than what's on the outside, so I've never seriously considered the relationship. Until now. My friends, the "Johnstons" have an iMac G5...and I love it. The sleek design, the effortless handling...excuse me please, I need a minute. Whew. Okay, I'm recomposed.

I think I might be addicted. I've been exploring the Apple website and shopping ebay all night. It's almost 1 a.m. and I just can't pull myself away. Sure, the sound of a keyboard has always excited me, but this is practically...okay, I won't go there. I think you understand my point.

So here is the solution to my dilemma. The most basic version of the iBook is $999 If everyone that I know, everyone who reads this blog, will just send me $1 when they read this blog, then I'll only need to collect an additional $989 to get one!! PLUS, if I put aside the extra money that I have out of every paycheck, then by the end of the month I'll only need $988!!!

I beseech you, please help my cause. Please send your $1 (though 100s are preferred). I promise to email frequently, post more often and THOROUGHLY ENJOY the iBook...when I'm finally able to get it.

Thank you for your contribution...and for helping to support my habit.

Wedded Bliss

Ahhhh :) I am truly enjoying the wedded life. Not only is my husband incredibly handsome, charming, polite and incredibly thoughtful, he's also quite the putz. I just want to state that so people don't become jealous thinking that I've found the perfect man. Trust me, he's far from perfect, but he's perfect for me.

Just to make you jealous and sick at the same time, here are some FABULOUS things about my husband:
- For Christmas he got permission from the landlord for me to get a kitty!!
- New brake pads and rotors, no labor fee
- Lots & LOTS & LOTS of Christmas lights and no work
- 14,398 picture frames hung on the wall in 8.27 seconds
- Never having to make the bed again, because I'm always up before him :)
- Tucking me into bed when I'm too tired to stand, but desperately trying to stay awake
- Two words: Snow-Plow

I am finally getting into the digital world, so I'm going to try posting some pictures. I hope this works!!

Twenty-three Days

I've now been married for twenty-three days. How has my relationship with Matt changed? Now he lives with me and we have sex. That's pretty much it. Honestly. It's refreshing to know that there haven't been any "changes" so-to-speak, but some nice "additions". We have everything that we had before and then some. It's quite nice actually :)

Unfortunately, I'm very tired right now and having a hard time keeping my eyes open. I'd love to write more about wedded bliss, but the brain is screaming "NAP TIME! NAP TIME!" and since I can hear the brain more easily than I can you, I have to check out.

Later.

Fourteen Days

Wow. In fourteens I'm going to be a wife. That hasn't really sunk in yet. In fact, I really, to be honest, have no idea what its going to mean for me. For the past two weeks people have asked if I'm nervous, excited, worried, scarred. No. Ask me again in two months, please.

I mean, honestly, I don't know what kind of demands will be made on my life once I become Mrs. Beery. I can't predict every change, twist, corner or bump. I could play the "what if" game for hours, but why? Why try to prepare myself for every possible situation, knowing full well that more than half of them will never occur. And if they do occur, it could be so far in the future that I my response would change anyway!

What is it going to mean to be a wife? I don't know yet. I appreciate all of the words of encouragement and wisdom - they will all be very helpful. However, the cut-n-dry fact of the matter is this: no one else is me, and no one else is Matt, so how can anyone predict how we'll act in a situation? Just because Sally and Herb were affected in this way by situation A does not mean that Matt & I will be as well. Every situation will be different. The advice is welcome and received, but may not pertain in the end.

This has really been challenging me. How am I going to know what to do? What if I mess up? What if...? Shouldn't I be nervous?!?

No. I shouldn't, not really. My faith is in God. My heart is in His hands. My life is His. If I try to be the perfect wife I will fail, so I've decided not to try. Instead, I'm going to do as God has commanded, as He desires for me to do. I'm going to love Him with all of my heart, soul and mind, and then I'm going to love Matt as I love myself. Those are the greatest commandments. If I can succeed at those, I have no fear for the rest of my life. Even last night, in the midst of a minor break down, God whispered softly, "Do you trust Me? Aren't I the source of your joy? Come talk to Me, spend some time with Me, and it'll be okay."

I'm not trying to over simplfy anything here. I'm going to do the best that I can do, for myself and for Matt AND for our marriage: I'm going to pursue God passionately. I believe His word is truth, and His word says to keep focused on Him. Don't make molehills into mountains - just look at Him and let Him worry about those molehills. When I'm not worrying about those I can focus on God. In so doing I can see that He has chosen to bring Matt into my life to be a compliment and a completion. When I focus on God, He brings Matt into the picture and my heart feels complete: God has woven the chord of three strands. All I had to do was focus on Him and the third piece came in. What else do I have to worry about?

Only fourteen days...

Auggghhh!!! Grrrr....humpffff.

I just spent, like, THIRTY MINUTES spilling my guts and letting the world know about the angst and turmoil I endure before posting a blog. I posted it, I went to read it - POOF! Nothing. Grrrr... (please reference "The World at Your Fingertips, archived Sept. 2004).

Well...TOO BAD!! You don't get to know now. Humpf. "I was going for innocence." - Pain, Hercules (the cartoon)

Okay, fine, I'll summarize:
Blog? What do I write? Funny? Trying to hard? Will anyone like it? Do I care? NO!!

That's it, in a nutshell - NOW GET OFF MY BACK! (Sheesh)

Sorry to keep raising my voice. I'm just frustrated. Sigh. Here's hoping someone else actually gets to see this.

Timing is Everything

(DISCLAIMER: The title has little to do with the blog...I just liked it and couldn't think of anything better).

Every now and then I remember I have a blog, so I like to contribute something to it. However, when I think about that I wonder, "Do I have to be clever again? What if I'm boring this time? Suppose people aren't satisfied and then never come back??" I receive quite a bit of peace in the fact that, other than those to whom I've sent this site, no one really comes to this site anyway. That is mildly reassuring. But I still ask myself, "How can I keep my friends from visiting my knittingdiva sister and still see me?"

Admittedly I don't live a very extraordinary life. These truly are nothing more than ramblings, but they give me something to do in the down time. There are only so many times you can call your best friend and say, "Nothing new here, how about you?" Its in those times that I enjoy listening to the sound of my keyboard as I spew my thoughts. If it was merely for my own benefit the content wouldn't be nearly as important, but everyone once in a while there may be an audience. The pressure builds!!

Don't get me wrong...I don't really care what you think. I mean, to some degree I do, but whether or not you think my blog is coherent, formulaic or random enough for you is of little concern to me. Whether my site is a collection of nonsense or a dedicated, thematic blog I just want the content to be enjoyable. (Yes, I do believe my sister can make her site about [bear with me] knitting entertaining, so long as it is well written).

So I pause: do I write today? I'm not feeling funny. I'm not feeling witty. I'm not feeling saucy. Is it worth it to write today? While I don't write about the same things I DO want to maintain a standard that I've set for myself: humor. I'm not going for gut-busting laughs or Comedy Central chuckles...I just want there to be an air of light-hearted humor...enjoyable humor.

Which leads me to the next dilemma: I don't laugh at the same things everyone else laughs at. If you've only seen Napoleon Dynomite once and don't ever care to see it again, you might not like this sight. Then again, you might. Did you laugh when Napoleon danced? Did you laugh when the paperboy fell off his bike in While You were Sleeping? Maybe we should talk.

Anyway, now I'm ready to post something, but these questions run through my mind. I've finally decided: who the hell cares? I mean, really, if you know me well enough to be reading my blog, you know me well enough not to expect the normal. And if you don't know me, I'm sorry. You're missing out.

I think I can carry on now. Thanks for letting me talk this out.

Special snaps to...

Valerie!! Woo hoo!!! Other than my brother-in-law's brother, she is only person who has ever responded to one of my blogs - whee!!! Two snaps for you baby! :)

A frustrated hotel worker...

Hello potential vacation-taker! Congratulations on your decision to get away from the everyday work schedule and enjoy some much needed time off. Before you are allowed to venture to the destination of your dreams we will need you to fill out the following application to find out if you will qualify as a vacationer. Please answer all questions honestly:

1) You arrive at the hotel to find out your room is not yet ready. Do you...

a. Ask about the regular check-in time and wait patiently, as you realize you are 3 hours early.

b. Ask if there is anything that can be done to get you into a room earlier and gratefully accept the clerk's offer to put you in the same type of room, only in a different part of the facility.

c. Belittle the staff, insult the management, demand to speak to every manager who has ever worked at the front desk until you find someone who is so scared of you that you finally receive an upgrade at no additional cost...but still have to wait 3 hours until check-in.

2) You've arrived at the golf mecca of the midwest, only to find walk into wildest monsoon of the season. Do you...

a. Accept the fact that God is God and He will do as He pleases: you make the best of the local towns and enjoy the adventurous drive. After all, as a golfer, this is a risk you take.

b. Talk to as many staff as you can find until you come up with a plan: you may have to spend the first day at the pool or using the in-room movies, but you can still fit in two rounds before the end of the trip!

c. Piss and moan about the weather, demand to be let on the courses when no one else is around, proclaim the idiocy of the golf professional for letting "a little sprinkle" ruin your weekend, ask for all of your money back, free food and a better room...and still only get your rainchecks.

3) It's dinner time. You show up at the restaurant at 7:30 pm with your closest 15 friends to discover you can't be seated until 9:00 pm. Do you...

a. Agree to wait in the lounge and ask for some munchies.

b. Wish you had made a reservation, and decide to find another restaurant.

c. Insult the hostess and demand to speak with a manager, insult the restaurant manager and demand to speak with the chef, insult the chef and demand to speak with the hotel manager. You finally get immediate seating...at another restaurant in the hotel.

4) You are checking out and realize there are additional charges on your room. Do you...

a. Ask what the charges are first and react later.

b. Angrily demand to know what the charges are, and then apologize when you realize they are your roommates.

c. Refuse to pay for anything, demand free lodging for the inconvenience, insist that it must have been the staff the snuck into your room to watch 4 different porn movies and yell for the manager...who compensates you by removing three of the four movie charges.

If you answered mostly A:

Congratulations! You are every hotel, restaurant, store manager, employee, housekeeper's dream! Take your vacation and make the most of it all!

If you answered mostly B:

You're on your way! Just remember, snafu's happen - try to catch more flies with honey than with vinegar and you should have a great time!

If you answere mostly C:

Unfortunately you are neither mature enough, graceful enough, smart enough, nor intelligent enough to take a vacation. We suggest you return to the Kindergarten Sunday School class for a few weeks. Once you have memorized the Golden Rule we will consider letting you retake the test.

Thank you for your time and have a GREAT vacation!

What the puck??

Well, its that time of year again and...wait, what? Okay, it's not actually that time of year yet. At least I can look forward to that time of year THIS year!! Unlike last year, left high and dry, alone and withering. Yeah, I'm rambling about hockey.

2004/2005 was a rough year for me. There were a lot of changes, challenges and uncertainties in my personal life. I would have liked nothing more than to sit back with a slightly-cool beverage, a big bowl of popcorn and relax on the couch...while watching ten adult men beat the #(%&* out of each other in an attempt to get a little, black puck into a big, white net. Alas, it could not be. Where was the NHL when I so desperately needed them? How is a girl to relieve the stress and pressure of everyday life without hurting anyone if she can't watch someone else do it for her? I needed an outlet, my own quiet world where I could disappear for three hours and let my brain have a much needed break. It was a sad, lonely time. For the sake of more money a year than I've made at my current job (for 4 1/2 years), they abandoned me.

But I understand that now the greedy little &$*#( have come to an arrangement, and I've even heard now that they are looking at changing some of the rules?!? I am so out of the loop. I JUST WANT MY STINKING HOCKEY!!! Why does everything have to be so confusing? All I'm asking for is ice, a puck, sticks, skates and burly men ready to check and score. Is that too much to ask?

I'm not entirely sure how I feel about the 2005/2006 NHL season this year. The trust has been broken. The wound has been left. Can I trust them? Will they be there for me this year? Will it be as enjoyable as it was in the past, or will the stain of greed mar it forever? Can they win back my love, or will it be as disappointing as an old boyfriend who you remembered fondly, but now realize is hollow and self-centered in his desperate, and transparent, attempts to keep you happy?

On the season will tell...

I Can Admit when I'm Wrong

I've been wrong. About a year ago I submitted a blog detailing the "lack of tradition" that my family maintains when it comes to holidays. In the past few months I've realized just how wrong I've been.
As I am currently discussing the option of marriage with the love-of-my-life (Hi Matt!) I've had to sit down and evaluate what means the most to me. As we've talked about the notion of holidays and our families is occured to me that there ARE traditions that my family maintains...and I'm not really ready to give them up.
The first is July 4th. Though I DID rag on it last year for being nothing more than an ice cream fest it has occurred to me that there is nothing I'd rather be doing on the 4th than eating as much ice cream as I can with my family. If the 4th happens to be on a Friday, Saturday, Sunday or Monday then the weekend tradition goes as follows: enjoy the beach, enjoy the art fair/parade, enjoy the House of Flavors (Day 1); for Day 2 - enjoy the beach, enjoy the art fair/parade, enjoy the Dairy Queen, enjoy the fireworks. Through into that mix quality time with the Taraskiewicz family and the Randolph clan and it has become...a tradition :) And it's one that I look forward to every year.
My next favorite family time is Christmas Eve. Since early childhood I've never been able to wait until Christmas Day to open presents. As my parents emphasized Jesus and family over Santa, we always did family gifts on Christmas Eve and a thing or two from Santa on Christmas. This not only drew our attention off of Santa Claus, but it also made it easier for the parents of impatient children to let them open presents NOW instead of later. But it's more than just that: there's dinner with Deerings, which includes french onion (or now perhaps Matzo Ball soup), shrimp and baby back rips. We throw in homemade Bailey's and luminaries...it, too, has become a tradition that I cannot imagine not living.
These quick little descriptions could never fully express how much I look forward to and LOVE my families quirks. Don't get me wrong, there are times my family makes me crazy, and there are times when I sometimes feel like running as fast as I can...but I could never run away from this. So many of my best time, my favorite memories, are tied into these two family traditions. Mom and Dad...thanks for making them happen :) I love you.

My name is Captain Craziness and I will be your pilot...

Have you ever felt as if your life was so out of control that they only way to regain ANY sense of sanity was to relinquish every bit of the reign and enjoy the ride? Yeah, me neither. GIMME THOSE REIGNS BACK!

I have no control over my life. No one can control their circumstances, but shouldn't you have some control of your life? Nope, I don't think so. Not here anyway. Not in my little village of "Why?"-ville. Why is this happening now? Why didn't this happen earlier? Why are you JUST bringing this up?? Whew. Am I rambling yet?

I do pretty well at making my own mistakes, digging my own holes. I can get myself into trouble without the assitance of anyone (thank you). But I can't see to get the, "Come on! Screw with my head!" tattoo off of my forehead, and I can't afford to have it removed (yet another aspect of non-control).

I'm sure this is nothing more than great googely-moogely (just in case Dave is reading) to most of you. I actually don't even care to explain it. This entry is really for the sake of Karin, and no one else. I don't care if you don't get it; I don't care if you're offended that I don't care. I'm trying to care, and I do, but apparently about the wrong things right now.

For my sanity, please, don't talk to me unless you mean it. Don't take a message if you aren't going to give it. Don't say you will if you won't. Don't blame me for your mistakes. Don't blame anyone else for your mistakes. Don't get pissed at the world when you realize that you, or your loved one, isn't perfect.

The greatest advice that I ever received came from my dad: "You're too thin skinned. Let it roll off your back." This was usually said while the tears were streaming, the shoulders heaving. It hurt to hear it and I wanted nothing more than to punch him in the nose. But he was right.

I've vented now...and I'm done. I can't change the people around me. I may never have full control of my life, and I'm not gonna pretend that I'll ever have even the slightest bit of control over others, but I'm going to enjoy it. I'm going to learn as much as I can from every person, situation and encounter. And I'm going to enjoy this ride that Capt. Craziness has plotted out for me...Bon Voyage!

I'm sorry, what was I saying?

I'm in love. Sigh. I know...I try to keep up my facade, but its much easier to just admit that I am a girl, I have girlie tendencies and blush when I think of my love (we'll call him...Simba. :) No, his name is Matt). The whole "love thing" definately puts a new spin on life. I find myself arranging my life differently these days. I often catch myself daydreaming and frequently plan my trips to Traverse City around his days off. It's all very new and exciting, though I find that I am more relaxed and comfortable than I have ever been.

This, however, is not the case for Mr. Matt. For as I spend many hours a day with my head blissfully in the clouds, my love takes an occassional moment to descend from the heavens to plant his feet back on earth for a moment or two. In fact, I have been more than entertained in the past few weeks as he continues to demonstrate complete distraction from everyday life :)

In a spirit of love and humor (and with a promise of a great-big-hug to Matt) I share with you some of the ways in which I've been able to distract the man of my dreams:

- While returning from British Columbia we were talking on the phone. Matt was so happy to talk with me that he took the wrong exit...and didn't realize it until he was 20 minutes in the wrong direction.
- We met for dinner this week. He was so excited to see me that he jumped right from his car to mine and we were off to the restaurant...with his headlights still on (nothing some good jumper cables can't handle).
- While getting ready to run some work related errands Matt decided to focus on me getting ready, instead of himself. Reverting back 22 years in his life, he put he shoes on the wrong feet.

I'm sure there are more examples, and I promise to keep you updated :) Until then...Matt, I love you!

The Maturing Process

I've always anticipated that as I grow older there would be things in my life that would change. I knew that Barbie would not always entertain me, and I somewhat suspected that the Little People would become too small for my growing hands. I knew I would have to trade in summer jobs for "real work", leaving the flashy world of, "Would you like fries with that?" for the more sophisticated world of, "Would you like wine with that?" However, there have been some changes that I could never be fully prepared to embrace.

As I age my desires and tastes have changed. I no longer want to have mile high bangs with hot pink plastic bracelets and jelly sandals. Earning that PhD has much less appeal. Coco Puffs are no longer my favorite cereal. I feel like an "adult" when I have my Kashi and plain non-fat yogurt for breakfast, while putting on my navy suit and heels. I've come to expect that my attitudes and tastes would mature as I do. But I was never expecting regression...

I have had to face a horrible, terrifying fact that not only makes me cringe, but causes me to question why such a sudden change NOW. I'm okay with the gray hair starting to appear, I can handle a wrinkle here and there, but I am disgusted, appalled even, at the most recent change of events. I like hot dogs.

This may sound quite melodramatic. Perhaps it is even ridiculous, but the fact remains that as I have grown into adulthood my tastebuds have spun a quick 180 and are heading back to 1983. I have NEVER enjoyed hot dogs - the mere thought still causes me to gag - yet I find myself craving the nasty, unidentifiable meat in thin, clear plastic casings. It's not that I enjoy the thought, for I most definately detest the dietary implications, yet I find myself waiting, and wanting for one more bite. All common sense has elluded me. Every nutritional fact is irrelevant. I long for another red hot...I dream about the next time they will be served in the Finer Diner that is our employee lunch room.

This is a lot for me to digest today (no pun intended). My world has been knocked off of its axis, spinning out of control into a direction I could have never fathomed it would take. I now find myself in need of a new map...and so I am off to my neighbor's, and their four children, to see if they can shed light onto this strange, new trail.

Verbal Eloquence

This lil' entry will be a work in progress. It is where I would like to submit my favorite quotes, supplied by my favorite people. For the privacy and safety of those involved, code names will be used. Please feel free to add any other lovely quotes as you hear them!

"I am completely unprepared for the situation. I have nine condoms in my pocket but no umbrella." ~Steen

"Kissin' leads to bangin'...and bangin's HOT!" ~Fuzz

Brief conversation between a guy and girl:
Guy: Secretly I want you
Girl: It's not a secret anymore
Guy: It's not?
Girl: No, you just told me.
Guy: Oh...

Boredom?

I've heard it said that if you're bored it's because you don't have enough to do. However, I have a a bit of a problem with that statement. I have plenty to do...I just can't do it NOW. Why is it that you are never in the right place at the right time to do what needs to be done?

Here I am at work...during the slowest winter I've known since being at the resort. With multiple variables contributing to our lack of guests, it often leaves me wondering how to fill the eight hours of the day (NOTE: I have almost exhausted the ideas from my previous blog entitled 'Top 10 Ways to Appear Busy at Work...'). Blogging still allows me to "sound busy", but I find my mind wandering to all of the things that I COULD be doing...if I was someplace else.

I need to mop my floor...I'd like to finish making my venison jerky (so I can return the jerky maker and have my counter top back)...I'd like to practice my guitar...it would be fun to paint a bit...I could really dig a nap right now. I have a GREAT list of things I could do!! But here I am, trapped behind a desk, wondering if I'm really bored, or just currently misplaced. I wouldn't be bored...if I was someplace else.

Sometimes I wonder, "If I was someplace else would I think about all of the things I could be doing at work?" Um...no. Well, I was just wondering.

I guess I could add a #11 to my list of ways to stay busy at work: #11 - make a list of the things you need to do when you get home...

I suppose I should "get to work".

When it's good to be a woman...

"A serious case of laptop burn was reported in a letter published in a medical journal two years ago after a 50-year-old man burned his penis while using a laptop balanced on his legs for an hour, despite wearing trousers and underpants."

Ouch.

Thanksgiving...

I've survived another Thanksgiving. I wish I was a bit more excited than I actually am, but I'm not. I have mixed emotions about Thanksgiving. It's not that I don't have a lot for which to be thankful, because I have TONS of things, but I still have a hard time with the holiday.

I don't really care for turkey. Fresh turkey I can handle, but I don't like leftovers. I have also never like gravy...sweet potatoes...or cranberries (though my mother is getting creative with some new recipes). So where does that leave me? With broccoli casserole, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes and stuffing. On the plus side I LOVE those four things, but I still often wonder, "Why all of this fuss over a meal that I don't particularly like?" Now if I was having a large veggie covered pizza, cheesy bread sticks and some chocolate soy-milk I could get behind it!! This year there was also the disappointment of no pumpkin pie. Sigh. However, as I do aspire to be an optimist instead of a pessimist...I did get to try my very first, made-from-scratch banana cream pie, and I found it quite delightful.

As Thanksgiving continues, and the meal comes to an end, the inevitable Christmas tree fiasco begins. I'm no Scrooge by any means, but the Christmas tree at my parent's house is a whole new beast. This year's theme: Crystal (and yes, next year's theme has already been picked). I enjoy decorating my own home, where I put things where I want and only put up what I want. Drill Sgt. Michelle will have none of that at Camp Van Buren. There must be order, as the theme depends upon it! In the past I usually put the tree together (yep, its fake) and have to put on the lights. Neither of these are my favorite, but I've somehow been designated as the tree/light girl. This year, I rebelled.

I wouldn't think the lack of desire or interest in creating the Crystal Christmas would be a big deal, but I heard plenty about it from the Sarge. I hope she realizes it for what it was: a simple lack of interest in tree lighting, and a final refusal to be bullied into that job. I'm not boycotting the tree, nor am I against having it...I'm just against my having to do anything if I don't want to do it. I can see how one would consider this selfish, and perhaps it is, but I was curious to see what would happen if, for one year, I did nothing. I gotta tell you...I liked it.

Now that the weekend is over the family can begin concentrating on other events, but Thanksgiving 2005 already lingers in the air. I'm neither excited, nor am I dreading it, but perhaps I will make further steps to alleviate the less popular aspects. I will stand firm in my conviction to not light the tree...I will enjoy lots of mashed potatoes with broccoli casserole...and perhaps sneak an order to Pizza Hut for dinner.

I love to write

And it's a good thing too. I jotted all of these notes down last night but never saved them. Luckily, it won't be a problem to start over again...

I love to write. I don't just mean the physical act of writing onto paper. I don't just mean the concept of researching and recording my thoughts. I love it all. I like watching the words form on the page as my pen leaves a trail of ideas and words behind. The click-clack of the keyboard is music to my ears. I enjoy the whole process.

I don't necessarily need a topic about which to write, but it helps. I have been known to write about anything, to ramble for the sake of writing. However, it is an incomplete experience without the planning, researching and eventual regurgitation of someone else's work mixed in with my own convictions. A topic helps, but I will write for any reason. It intrigues me that I studied English in college for the opportunity to read, but I now miss the challenge of writing.

My job doesn't give me the full experience of writing. I have the opportunity to record and distribute data, but it is still lacking. It lacks me. Please don't misunderstand, as I don't desire fame or recognition. However, I do want the opportunity to let my soul be seen. It's not that I believe that my opinion is right, or that anyone even really cares what my opinions are, but I want the opportunity to express them. In writing I have to chance to think about life, formulate the right words and then to share them, with or without anyone knowing from whence the ideas came.

Perhaps that is why I prefer the written word to the spoken word. There aren't many people who know me that will tell you I have a problem with the spoken word. Quite the opposite actually. I often suffer diarreah of the mouth, with anything and everything spilling forth. My tongue too frequently works more quickly than my brain and I put myself in a bad situation, wishing I could take back what just errupted, or that I could think of a better apology. That is rarely the case with writing. I think writing is the left-brained man's art form. I can research, outline, create note cards and proof-read before submitting my final copy. It gives me the joy of being myself as creatively and as organized-ly (?) as I desire.

Funny, how I spent four years dreading the next writing assignment, then four years thankful that I am no longer under that pressure. And now? I'm ready for that challenge again...